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Reaching Out to Every Woman You want to up your odds and shoot for the stars—or, rather the girl who's out of your league.
But new research from Binghamton University says you're being too self-centered and aggressive.
This is the core thinking of the partner who initiates hot/cold, and serves as their safety net to vulnerability. Because relationship uncertainty makes human beings yearn for stability.
They're not sorting out their last breakup, and they're not swamped at work. The hot/cold scenario typifies much more than a lack of certainty on a lover's part. You quickly find yourself craving more of this delicious new feeling.
This phase lures you into the hopes of the possibility of romance.
One minute you're high on the warmth of their attention, the next minute you're frozen out and left wondering what happened. Whether you call it push/pull, on/off, or hot and cold, the end result is the same. Whether done consciously or unconsciously, this type of behavior activates longing and pursuit. If we don't understand the game of hot and cold, we can find ourselves pulled into a drama of confusion. Understanding this type of behavior is crucial even for those of you committed to not playing games.
Behavioral extremes indicate a power play is being employed. Once we have the ability to see hot and cold for what it is, we're less likely to suffer its negative effects.